trash or treasure

trash or treasure

I want to clarify that my Christmas rant was not at all about cheapness. I love cheapness. I detest thoughtlessness. I am a huge fan of thrift stores, clearance racks, dollar stores, and garage sales. If one is patient these places can yield some pretty nice treasures. Alternatively, if you’re entertained by wierdness, you will love the following nuggets of joy I’ve photographed over the years with my sad little camera phone that unfortunately has the loudest clicking sound ever so people must think I’m a giant nutcase.

Row 1: Ashtrays from the dollar store. These are the most tasteful two of a set of 4, maybe? I can’t remember, but I couldn’t take more than two pictures because a lady and her grandson came into the aisle and I felt like a creep so I moved on.

Row 2: For the love of Big Lots. Last year I went looking for a baby doll for Minimike and had to take a picture of this to sent to Mike. He texted back a horrified scream. Next is Akthar Noir Pour Homme: Impression of Drakkar Noir. I am trying to picture the guy who was at the height of his awesomeness in 1988 and can’t believe his eyes that he can smell like 1988 for only $3.50. I feel bad laughing, because my imagination conjures up an Asian guy, and then I have to chastise myself for stereotyping.

Row 3: On the left, a clearance item at Target. Yes, Target tried to sell girls’ hipsters made to look like boys’ underwear. So all the people who boycotted Target can have a little giggle at Target’s unprofitable venture into prepubescent cross-dressing. The last photo is durian. It’s only $1.69/lb – affordable enough to get one for every person on your Christmas list! Except, perhaps, you should find out whether or not they liked durian. Because while it’s fresh and tasty and good for you, its offensive odor got it banned for airlines. It’s not for everyone.

We are so blessed to live in a society where relative affluence and variety of goods make it possible to get exactly what we want. If you don’t know what to get, there’s cash and gift cards. But something is getting lost! Theoretically, according to Mauss, anyway, we give to create social bonds and the giver gives up a bit of self through the gift. Therefore, I can envision the appropriateness of the booby-ashtray and appreciate the thought that goes into gifting it. Whereas in my rant, there’s no possibility that the giver gave this a moment’s thought. Besides that, my mother, who never agrees with me, agrees with me on this. Truly, a Christmas miracle!

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