Dear Prudence

Dear Prudence

I confess that I lack a generous spirit when I read “Dear Abby.” Sometimes I think that the situations are so stupid that there’s no way they were writing about themselves – it’s some poor woman trying to shame a relative or neighbor by writing a humiliating letter. Much of the time I am annoyed that they don’t have anyone else to turn to but Dear Abby. Every once in a very rare while I read a letter that moves me, like today, from a homemade Christmas card sender about an imprudent recipient.

DEAR ABBY: Five years ago, when my niece was 9, we came up with the idea of making Christmas cards and sending them out to special friends and family members. We both work hard to make sure each is attractive and in good taste, and we handwrite a personal note inside. We also print on the back that the card was “handmade with love.” This has become a tradition for the two of us, and the cards are quite beautiful.

Last year, after we sent them out, I received a card from a friend with a small check inside. The card read, “I’m sending you this check so you can afford to buy ‘real cards’ next year.” I was, to say the least, hurt and offended. I wondered if others felt similarly, so I asked around and was shocked to learn they, too, thought I was “cheap.” Although it cost more money and time to create each card, no one appreciated them.

We won’t be making the cards this year, but how do I tell my niece why? I don’t want her feelings hurt, too. — BLUE AT CHRISTMAS

DEAR BLUE: Tell your niece what you were told — and by whom — so she won’t waste any more effort on these rude and unappreciative individuals. Better she hear it from you than one of the recipients.

As to the “friend” who sent the check, I hope you returned it and deleted her from your Christmas card list. What she did was uncalled for.

There are no words to express how sad I felt for the letter-writer, “Blue at Christmas.” I would like to believe that no one would be so rude but I can name someone that would actually do that. Not that she would never be on my Christmas card list.

So from one card crafter to another, here’s to you, “Blue.” May your days be merry and bright, and may you never again have to endure the misfortune of an unappreciative friend.


The other LL just posted the same letter, only with this brilliant response via boingboing. Hilarious.

I feel much better now, don’t you?

3 thoughts on “Dear Prudence

    • Author gravatarAuthor gravatar

      I would have cashed the check and kept sending cards. Saying that was tacky.

    • Author gravatarAuthor gravatar

      Everyone’s got something to complain about, right?

      I realize it’s so much easier to send out e-cards with automatically generated labels and more cost effective to blast your social network with greetings. But do more people now prefer to receive paperless greetings?

      Earlier this week Dear Abby advised a reader that she if she didn’t want to read someone’s long braggy annual report, she may discard it with the rest of the junk mail!

      Ah, well, to each his own. I will probably keep sending out our 200-word annual family digest, even if its fate is the junk mail pile. Someone’s gotta keep USPS afloat.

    • Author gravatarAuthor gravatar

      I always look forward to it. They are wonderful. But, i didn’t get one this year. Did you decide not to send them after all?

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